2021.

 2021. The year everyone was hoping would be substantially better than 2020. We made it 6 days. 

Due to the big ideas I had for 2020 and that turning awful....I'm focusing my 2021 energy on something else. Things I can control. For instance, in 2020 I turned 29. I wanted to have a huge party that was 1920s themed and ring in the last year of my roaring 20s in a bomb flapper costume that I would look SO good in. However, for my 29th birthday I had a nice, quiet dinner with a close friend and was home before 9pm. I really am not looking forward to turning 30 this year. Which I know isn't THAT big of a deal. I mean it's 30. But, I had big plans for my 20s and the majority of them didn't happen. I figured that by now I'd be married and maybe have a kid..or adopted a kid. I'd have my dream job. I'd just be killing it at life. 

I figured out a long time ago that those plans weren't going to play out the way I wanted them to. I mean honestly, 17 year old Kymber read Breaking Dawn 20 million times because Edward Cullen was the ideal man. Flash forward to 29 year old Kymber and I almost threw up typing that sentence. So the same goals 17 year old me had for when I turned 30 are not the same goals and dreams 29 year old me has. Weird how life works out, huh? 

My goals have always varied over the years. But, I also wanted to get skinny. That was my goal. Get skinny and someone will love me. I wanted a quick fix to a lifelong problem and that's not a thing. I'd tell myself if only I looked like so and so, I would be happy. If only I wore these size clothes, I will be happy. And last year after spending most of the year alone with my dog...it really made me look inside myself. A friend once told me no matter the weight I lost, it won't make me happy. It didn't make him happy when he had "the perfect male body." And I kind of thought about that...and agreed to an extent. But being alone last year really hit home with that idea. If I want to be happy I need to love who I am at any weight. And let me tell you what....I'm pretty freaking awesome. My personality is like a 9/10. I'm a firm believer there is always room for improvement and I am constantly learning how to be a better person. So that's why I'm not a 10/10. ;P Even though 2020 wasn't the best year...it helped me work on myself mentally. And 2021 is the year I'm going to work on myself physically. And maybe ring in my 30s with a 1920s themed party. 

Part of my goals for 2021 is also trying to focus on things that make me happy. Whether that be updating this blog more or different ways to write. I mean I'm a published author. I've helped write press releases and interviewed musicians...ones I know...but still counts. I put together the company newsletter at my job...I just miss that aspect of college. Writing. I think I'm pretty good at it. But, I don't think I'm creative enough to write a book....unless it's a book on how trash dating is or how annoying hook up culture is when you don't want a random hook up. I'm not sure that would be interesting enough to write an entire book on...or at least one that I'm writing. I've been thinking about this for a few months...and then a friend of mine from my teenage years completely redid her company. She started this AMAZING accessory store a few years ago and it's been amazing. Last week she announced that it is now going to primarily be a MAGAZINE. How awesome is that? Seriously. She's chasing her dreams and killing it. Lily, if you're reading this...I'm so inspired to follow my dreams more. So, here's to being a freelance writer, maybe? Not for the Rozie June magazine. This isn't me shooting my shot to be in that....it just made me realize that I've got to be better at following my dreams. 

A musician friend of mine once told me that I needed to believe in myself...because nobody else would. Telling people how talented I am at something doesn't get me anywhere. I have to believe I can do it and follow through. I've wanted to do a Birmingham music scene blog...and I started one...and got busy and it didn't go anywhere. I need to focus on what I want to do and how to do it. 

Here's to 2021...the year to start chasing your dreams and following through. If you don't believe in yourself, who will? 

Stay safe. Wear a mask. Wash your hands. 

Treat people with kindness. 

XO

Kymber.