Whoa. It has been a CRAZY weird year you guys. I had such high hopes at the start of the year. I was a red head, pushed outside of my comfort zone and I was feeling myself. Fast forward to the middle of March and everything was shut down. I was deemed an essential worker, so I still went to work my usual schedule and face masks became a thing. I have told SO many people how much I really like their masks....because it's now a fun way to mix up your outfits.
I've known people that have gotten COVID-19....I've known people that have died from it. It's a serious issue. I hope if you are reading this you're doing your best to keep the people you love, and yourself, safe. In order to keep myself and my loved ones safe, I have been social distant....for MONTHS. It's really been hard on my mental health. I thought I was doing pretty good...and then one day I ended up at Nick's grave having a mental breakdown. -_- Please take care of not only your physical health, but your mental health during this time too. It's just as important.
So, I've seen this trend on TikTok about how your 17 year old self would feel about who you are now. I really thought about that...17 year old me would not be impressed. I had big dreams for myself by 29. I wrote a list of things I wanted to do by the time I turned 30...some of them are done...most of them are not. Also, I must have thought I'd be like a millionaire by the time I was 30 because I wanted to go to the Super Bowl and a college national championship game...and things I couldn't ever think about affording at the moment. Which, is fine. I'm not upset about not being able to go to those things. I just wish some of the other things on that list were done...the more personal items. But, here I am...still trying to figure things out. Life is just SO much harder than I would have ever thought 12 years ago. I just wish I would have been better prepared for what was coming my way.
On a sad note....about a month ago a friend of mine announced that his nephew had passed away unexpectedly. Oof. A friend of his sister's had started a GoFundMe type page to raise money for the funeral. That brought back a lot of memories I haven't thought about in years. The pain of going through something that you never thought would happen to you or your family...the kindness of strangers helping pay for a funeral you shouldn't have to plan. I checked that fundraiser multiple times a day...donated as much as I could...reached out to my friend, and his sister, that I've never met, and cried for the loss of their loved one. I just wanted to give them both giant hugs and cry with them. Thankfully, that fundraiser raised over twice as much as they were trying to get. I really wish there was something more I could have done for them. But, knowing that I could share the fundraiser and donate...to help reduce the financial burden/stress...I felt that it was not only a way to help their family, but a way for me to pay it forward from the kindness that had been shown to my family. Thank you to everyone that shared my posts and/or donated.
Tell the people you love that you love them every day. Take risks. Pushing your limits can be scary...and even though things haven't gone my way this year...at all...I'm glad I've been able to push out of my comfort zone. I saw this poster that said "Your comfort zone will kill you." Wow. I felt personally attacked. Don't get stuck in your comfort zone...you never know what you'll miss out on.
I now have a list of things to do by the time I turn 30 next year. (I think I just threw up in my mouth.) Thanks to a day out with my 13 year old niece and some of her suggestions...this is a list I will be able to realistically finish by October 2021.
I don't know when I'll update you again....There hasn't been a lot to say lately. My life has been filled with work and Netflix binge watching.
Stay safe. Be happy. And somehow we'll all make it through this crazy time.
XO
Kymber.
