No Bird Will Want to Sing Today....

It's 1:20am and I cannot sleep. My mind keeps running...and it won't stop.

If you are paying attention to my Facebook/Twitter or you're a fan of Bobby Long, you know his third album, Ode To Thinking, is less than a month away from release. It's such an amazing thing...the anticipation of an album you helped fund in a small way. In a small scale in the grand scheme of things you feel like you've been a part of something great...something bigger than you are. That probably sounds crazy though right? 

I've heard most of the songs, if not all of them, live. They are each amazing in their own right. Bobby's an amazing songwriter and I feel as though each song has something in it that I connect to. If you haven't checked Bobby or his music out...you really should. This album is going to be great. I've heard Bobby say on several occasions that he believes this is the best album he's made thus far in his career. 

But, this isn't a blog post about Bobby's new album or how you MUST go preorder it immediately. 

The last time Bobby put out a CD...Nick was alive. I was able to host a CD listening party at a record store in Birmingham and Nick helped me set things up for that. Even though he gave me a hard time for always doing all these crazy things for Bobby. That was a fun day. Two months before he died. I miss him so much each and every day. I will never stop missing him. I just wish I could hug him one last time. Tell him I love him and that I miss him. 

It kills me that no matter what Bobby will always have some association with my brother. For a long time after Nick died I felt guilty. Which is crazy because nothing I could have done differently that day would have made the outcome any different. But, instead of staying at home that fateful Saturday, I went to Nashville to see Bobby. I remember standing in the bar waiting for the first act to go on and turning around to see Bobby being escorted backstage by security. I was so excited...and that excitement quickly turned to anguish after talking to my mom. I had to get out of there immediately. There were times in the following days that I would often wonder what I was doing the moment Nick took his last breath. I used to have this like...movie moment in my mind...I turned to see Bobby and Nick would be dying in that same moment. But, he was gone at least two hours before that happened. 

When Bobby came through Birmingham that following August, the closer it got the more I didn't want to go. I didn't want to be reminded of that night in Nashville...or to end up having a panic attack in the middle of the show. I know that sounds crazy but that's where I was at. I got a thirty minute meet and greet with Bobby where we talked about a lot of different things. I don't remember most of it...but I do remember that he didn't look at me with those pity eyes that I have grown to hate. I don't want nor do I need anyone's pity. I get that life has dealt me some pretty crappy hands. I don't need a dumb look on your face to remind me. I think I get that fact more than anyone else. 

I vowed that I would never return to Nashville to see Bobby ever again. I couldn't do it. Sometimes when people bring up that show I feel sick. Like everything is closing in on me. But, it's gotten better over the years. In March of this year I was able to go see Bobby play in Nashville. I am so glad I went. It was a great night with friends and good music. I definitely needed that night to have a more pleasant memory of Nashville. 

Two of the things I hold near and dear to my heart are forever intertwined. No matter how much Nick made fun of me...he was always supportive of my dreams and thanks to Bobby I have a dream career in mind. A career I never would have thought of before finding out about his music. I sometimes wonder what would have happened if I hadn't listened to Cari and looked him up. What if I never would have seen that YouTube video of Bobby's "Dead & Done." What if I never went to that first show at WorkPlay in 2011? How different would my life be today? 

I know everyone thinks I'm crazy for the love I have for Bobby's music. The amount of time and energy I've spent in supporting one artist can be a bit much...I know. But, when you have something that touches your soul in such a way....you'd do anything for others to experience that. When I was 19 and saw Bobby for the first time....before that night was over I knew I wanted to help him gain more fans and make it big. Four years later I'm still pursuing that. Even though most people think I'm crazy. But, what's the fun in life without a little crazy right? But..not too much crazy. 

His lyrics have helped me in the darkest of moments. More times than I can count I have turned his music on to help calm me down in different situations, but especially after the death of my brother. Music can heal the soul. I believe that to be completely true. It's healed parts of my soul and continues to change my life. 

That is why I believe in and support Bobby Long. In some ways he's connected to memories of my little brother and I can't let that go. His music has helped me more than I will ever be able to express to him. 


" Break the branch upon the willow, no bird will want to sing today,

Cut loose the boats down in the boat house, we’ve never seen such strange old days,
Tell the lost that no one’s looking, tell the found that no one cares,
You can never find the answers, we’ve never seen such strange old days,

So long to thinking, the crowd will travel well,
We’ve unchained a monster and it left me feeling unwell,
So long to knowing, the past is buried still, under a hard place in an empty wishing well.

No one’s coming for the helpless so come and quickly help yourself" -- Bobby Long 'Ode to Thinking'

Until next time.

XO

Kymber.

London's Calling...Day 1

It's been a long time since I've posted on here...and I haven't told you guys everything about London! WHAAT? Crazy. I know. When I came back home a few things happened very quickly...1. I picked up a baby sitting job and 2. I picked up a new internship. This internship was completely unexpected and out of the blue....but I'm still pinching myself about it. And I don't want to jinx it..so that's all you get to hear about that. 

Anyways....Saturday, May 9th I met up with Rileigh just outside of Atlanta for us to go to the airport to begin our adventure! When Tammi went to drop us off we thought we might have to be at the international side of the Atlanta airport...since we were eventually leaving the country. But, we did not. So, we had to figure out how to get to the domestic side of the airport. Which, if you've ever flown in or out of Atlanta..you know how confusing that airport is. Anyways, we get through security and all that and an hour or two later we were heading towards North Carolina for a short stop before the NINE HOUR FLIGHT to Heathrow. I ended up getting a bloody nose on the way to NC...it was not fun. But, thankfully it went away quickly. We loaded onto our plane...and left an hour late. AN HOUR LATE. So, instead of taking off at 10:30 as planned...we left at 11:30. Which was 5:30am in London. Yay. My TV screen didn't work...so I couldn't watch any movies. Rileigh was kind enough to let me borrow one of her headphones until I fell asleep. When I woke up we had a few hours until we would be landing at Heathrow...or so I thought. We had to circle around for 30 extra minutes before we could land...since we were late and Heathrow was busy. When we were finally off the plane and waiting on our luggage it was 1:30-ish. 2 hours after we were originally supposed to land. So, we get our luggage and are like "Okay..let's go through customs and then we can be on our way to the Heathrow Express." So, we go and are like "Where do we need to go for our bags to be checked?" And every worker there is like "keep going..." So, nobody checked our bags. Which I thought was weird. Anyways, we figure out where we needed to go to buy our tickets for the Heathrow Express...which is a nonstop train to Paddington Station. Once we got to Paddington Station we had to figure out where to go to buy our 7 day unlimited pass to the Underground/Tube/Subway..whatever you want to call it. We get to the place to buy our passes...and this EXTREMELY rude lady wasn't helpful...AT ALL. She kept talking to her coworkers behind her and I was SO close to giving her a piece of my mind. I was tired, smelt horribly and was about to lose it! Anyways, I got my pass and walked away before I screamed. After what felt like FOREVER we finally figured out which line we needed to get on to make it to King's Cross Station. So, we get on the platform and there is this sign that says "For King's Cross get off on Edgeware Rd and change trains." So, obviously we get off on that stop. After 10 minutes of confusion...we realize the sign lied and we shouldn't have gotten off on that stop. At this point I'm dead on my feet, mad, I smell horrible and I keep praying we don't run into anyone I know. Anyways, we get back on the tube and then get off on the King's Cross stop. I take off trying to get to the exit and figure out where our hotel is. And I'm thinking Rileigh is behind me...and then I hear Rileigh in a voice I can only describe as defeat.." Oh noooooo.....I didn't mind the gap!" There's a large wave of people coming from the tube, so I can't get over there to help her...nobody else helps her either. But, finally she is victorious and gets her suitcase wheel unstuck from the gap! And then we are on our way. 
We checked into the hotel...where this guy came to help us with our luggage. However,  he could only help with one bag, so he took one of Rileigh's bags. He told me to leave one of my bags on the first floor and he'd come back for it...Uhh...no. I'm gonna take my bag with me sir. I don't trust people in this hotel...please led us to our room. He looked at me like I was crazy, but continued up the three flights of stairs to our room. Anyways, we get to the room, unpack and shower. I FaceTime with my mom and show her around our flat and then we go out to discover where we were staying and find food! We ate at this awesome pizza place, Pizza Express. The waiter was so nice and the pizza was amazing. There was a couple seated near us...that had one 12" pizza each. And they both finished it and had dessert. Like...seriously? Rileigh and I shared a 12" pizza and we were too stuffed to eat any dessert right then. Anyways, then we went back to the room to figure out where a grocery store was and we found a convenience store a short walk away from our flat. So, we ventured out to the store and got a few small things: Candy, water, ice cream. Then we headed back to our flat to snack on our treats and hopefully get some sleep. That proved to be unsuccessful and we were both up at random times of the night. Jet lag is a fat whore and I hate her. 
But, we were able to get up the next morning to head off on our next adventure.....The Making of Harry Potter: Harry Potter Studio Tours..but more on that tomorrow. 
XOKymber.

 On our way to Paddington Station on the Heathrow Express! 

I'm Perfectly Incomplete. I'm Still Working on My Masterpiece.

Oh wow. It has been a long time since I posted on here. Life has been CRAZY. I'm finishing up my final semester of my college career. I'm determined to never return to college. I will become a hobo before I try to go to school again. The last forever has just been too exhausting and depressing to even think about doing it willingly again. 

I've been thinking a lot about the last few years. I started college in the Fall of 2009. I was hopeful about my degree in Marketing and that I would obviously graduate in 4 years. What a joke that turned out to be. I couldn't stand the school of business. I just did not fit there. Everyone was too uppity for my liking. So, after three and a half years as a Marketing major I switched to Mass Communications with a concentration in Public Relations. Which, had I known there was a PR degree I probably would have started there...too little too late though, huh? I will graduate majoring in Public Relations with a minor in Marketing. So, not all those years were a complete loss. My GPA suffered greatly from my time as a Marketing major. I learned a lot from that experience though...about myself and others. I was able to turn things around in my new course of study though...so that's great. 



When I started college I had no idea what I wanted to do really. I

knew I wanted to some how go into PR. But I wasn't sure if I wanted to be a publicist for athletes or celebrities or a large corporation. I just wasn't sure. It wasn't until the start of 2011 that I figured out what I wanted to do. I've said this on here before...and people I talk to know what helped me figure out my life. Thanks to my sweet friend CariDean I found out about British musician Bobby Long. His debut album came out in February 2011 and I saw him at WorkPlay in Birmingham shortly after. His talent just amazed me. I kept thinking to myself why don't more people know about this guy? He's British, talented and a nice guy...what is wrong with people? So, I decided that I wanted to help musicians like hi gain a larger fan base and become better known in general. And now, four years later I have seen him 10 times, he played a private show for my birthday party and I have some amazing friends I would never have met had it not been for his music. It's amazing to me how music can bring people from all different backgrounds and points in life together. Some of my favorite moments of my college career have been because of Bobby's music...whether it was because I was traveling to see him with one of my best friends, or spending time with people I've met at shows, it all relates back to him and his music. I'm not sure there are enough 'Thank You' cards in the world to thank that man for what he has brought into my life. 

I've lost a lot of people in my life since 2009. Whether it be because they have passed away or I realized they shouldn't be in my life anymore, there were still losses. When I was a freshman my Uncle Bob passed away from cancer. I was so devastated...that wasn't something anyone could have prepared me for. Unfortunately, life goes on and just because he was gone didn't mean my life would stop. 

In the winter of 2011 my niece was diagnosed with cancer. I felt like my family could just not catch a break. This sweet little 2 1/2 year old was going to have to undergo something I would never wish upon anyone. But, after her surgery to remove the tumor and a round of chemotherapy she has been cancer free since the summer of 2012.  

Then....something happened in the Spring of 2013 that shook my entire family up...it's a loss we will never fully heal from. My little brother died in a car accident. By this point I was ready to give up. Throw the towel in and say eff you universe. Because obviously the world hated me and wanted to see me miserable. But, after taking a week off from classes and going crazy, I went back to finish the last month of the semester. I took 3 weeks off from work and drained my savings. And I still got some of the best grades that semester than I'd ever had before. How that happened? I have no clue. I think my teachers took sympathy on me. Ha. 

But, here I am. Two years later and about to graduate college with $40,000 in loans to pay back. A job at a grocery store. Living with some friends because my mom found a job in OKC. I graduate in 36 days and leave for my dream trip to London in 50 days. I'll be starting my "grown up" life and truing to figure out what to do next. I'm not sure where my life is going to take me. I have no idea where I might get a job. Will it be in Birmingham? Or will it be somewhere else? It's going to be an interesting ride that's for sure. But, I'm going to come out on top whatever direction I go. If I have learned anything about life through my college career it's to not give up. No matter how hard life gets...it will eventually get better. Maybe not as good as you want it to be...but it's better than the lowest point you have been. It can only go up from here. 

I'm on Spring Break for the next week and then I have three weeks left of school. That's it. So, I probably won't post again until I get back from London. So, thank you to everyone that has supported me over the last few years. You're support and encouraging words have meant so much to me. Thank you. 


Love you all. 

XO
Kymber.